Body confidence is something I think we all struggle with, we all have our ups and our downs. I don’t believe there is such a thing as the ‘genetic lottery’ (says the girl with the genetic disability!)- someone could be the ideal picture of what is considered attractive and still have issues with the way they look and equally, someone else can have a part of their body that is off-putting to others but genuinely doesn’t bother them.
I have a double scoliosis; that’s a double curvature of the spine. A 45 degree angle at the top and a 45 degree angle at the bottom. My ribs at the top go one way and at the bottom go another way. The right side of my body has a little waist and then lots of muscle at the shoulder and the left is just straight down so it has to carry all of my upper weight at the waist and has a lot of muscle here.
It really does hurt as much as it sounds. I take huge amounts of painkillers daily. Sometimes it feels like I have hot pokers being stabbed between my vertebra and then wrenched. Mainly it’s just a general ache similar to dropping a huge book on your foot.
If I were to have my spine straightened the operation would mean breaking all of my ribs at the front and the back, screwing a metal rod to my spine and then attaching each rib to that rod again.
As tempting as it is to become the female Wolverine… I genuinely don’t care enough to do something about it. I have bigger issues: my hair is naturally straight.
And not just a little straight. Really, really, straight. Now that bothers me.
I will happily walk around in just a bikini top, anyone can see my bent spine and lumpy muscly bits sure, whatever. But please don’t do a close up of my teeth!
I also had a mini stroke and now can’t feel the left side of my face plus it moves very slowly. That one sided little smirk? This is paralysis, I’m not actually flirting with you… or am I?
The point is, we all have body issues and no one really cares about yours, they’re too busy thinking about their own. Choose one part of your body that you can control- your hair for example- and channel all of your issues into that.
World peace. Solved.