Food · Grain Free Recipes

The Easiest Tuna Lasagna Ever

This is a take on my Best Ever Gluten Free and Low Carb Lasagna but it involves tuna and is the easiest way of making lasagna that has ever existed.

Since I work from home I always feel the desire to put food on the table in time for my wife to arrive back from work in the evening… despite my chronic fatigue! Sometimes this results in very basic meals (or on the days when I’m really too tired: a sobbing girl turning circles in kitchen with a wooden spoon in hand) but when I’m on form I like to go all out to treat her with fancy dinners made of a thousand parts!

… This is not one of those recipes.

Oh no, this recipe is one of those amazing things: a meal that looks like a lot of work but really, really isn’t. It also doesn’t take too long to pull together so if you’re hosting guests but won’t have a lot of time to prepare or just don’t want to spend lots of time in the kitchen then you’ll love this recipe. It’s the easiest way of making lasagna you’ve ever come across- it’s also gluten free since we’re using butternut squash sheets though you can use regular pasta sheets too. Aim for fresh pasta but if you’re using dried then keep the dish in the oven for 10 minutes longer to make sure they whole thing is cooked.

Other excellent things about this recipe: you can spice it up or add as many herbs as you desire! I’ve obviously made this recipe Low FODMAP, which means excluding onions and garlic, but if you have a stronger stomach than me (and let’s be honest, that’s most people!) then throw in either some sweated onions and chopped garlic or just granules. I think coriander is great in this recipe but a number of people in my life seem to prefer chopping their own foot off to eating ‘leafy soap’ so I’ve left it out. Basil is also lovely on the top.

The most important part of this recipe is that you let the lasagna stand for AT LEAST 10 minutes after taking it out of the oven. I often forget to do this because I have no patience and thus a sloppy messy ensues. Letting it stand means a nice, firm, slice of lasagna can be cut.

 

Recipe

Butternut squash lasagna sheets (400g)
2 tins tuna
1 carton passata (500g)
green tops of one bunch spring onions
1 tub cream cheese (lacto free if needs be)
1 ball mozzarella
50g grated cheese
salt and pepper

  • Preheat oven to 180C
  • Drain the tuna and mix with the passata.
  • Add the spring onion tops and any herbs or spices you might be using.
  • Starting with the sheets, layer the ‘pasta’ cream cheese and tuna mix. Finish with a layer of pasta.
  • Top the final layer with cream cheese, grated cheese and the sliced mozzarella.
  • Bake for 40 minutes.
  • Stand for 10-15 minutes.
  • Serve with salad or vegetable side.
lasagna
Notes

I use ‘lacto-free’ versions of cheeses in this dish as lactose doesn’t agree with me but if you’re dairy friendly then… well… throw more cheese at it!

If my wife is not to hand to do the chopping (she’s very skilled with a huge knife) then I use pre-chopped butternut squash sheets. For other Low Carb, Gluten Free or Low FODMAP options for pasta you can, of course, use the gluten free pasta variations that are now sold in many supermarkets or you can stay super healthy and use other sliced vegetables that are up to the task like courgette or aubergine. Go on. Be healthy. You’re eating an awful lot of cheese anyway.

lasagna

Classical Film Reviews · Film Reviews

Classical Film Review: Ninotchka [1939]

ninotchkaThe advertising slogan for 1939’s Ninotchka read “Garbo Laughs”- and it perfectly sums up this remarkable film! Greta Garbo steps down from her ice queen pedestal part way through the film, playing stern Communist Comrade Ninotchka, who slowly warms to the appeal of Parisian romance and champagne.

Three Soviet emissaries, played by Felix Bressart, Sig Rumman and Alexander Granach, arrive in Paris for a mission but find themselves a little… overwhelmed by the joys of the west! Superbly efficient Comrade Ninotchka is sent to do the job instead- being equal to three men- and retrieve the jewels of former Grand Duchess Swana. It is the Soviet government’s contention that the property of the aristocrats belongs to the people. Things become rather complicated however once the Grand Duchess’ lover, played by Melvyn Douglas, takes a fancy to Ninotchka… distraught Duchess Swana decides she will give up all claim to the jewels if the not-so-frosty-anymore commissar will fly away from her count.

Whilst many of Garbo’s films rely on her presence alone for their appeal, that is not the case with Ninotchka- her first film in English and the penultimate of her career.

Billy Wilder’s brittle, witty script- written with Charles Brackett and Walter Reisch- is the strong yet flexible backbone of a film that merrily charges through bumbling emissaries and abrupt changes in personality without loosing it’s naturally light touch.

Playing opposite Garbo, Melvyn Douglas is sauve in his dinner jackets and manages to play some pretty gushy romantic dialogue with enough playfulness to loose neither his conviction nor his edge. Indeed, in an adroit satire of both Communism and capitalism, Ninotchka never looses its sweetness- however sad it might be. It is notable as one of the earliest political spoofs of Stalin’s Communist Russia and even more remarkable for being released during the second world war. With its absolute control, power of censorship and drab life of deprivation, it’s made clear why the Russian emissaries aren’t keen to return to the Soviet Union.

One of the best parts is witnessing Garbo shift gears from a humourless deadpan to cracking up at Douglass falling off his chair. The seriously-austere figure turning playful may be something that we have seen before but rarely has it been done so well! Ninotchka is a brilliant satire, combining farce, romance and politics, it’s funny without loosing Garbo’s elevated intensity and you would be remiss to miss it.

Chronically Fabulous · Femme

How To Stop Nausea! Sickness Hacks That Work

One of the symptoms of my condition, along with being actually sick, is nausea- which I personally think is so much worse. So. Much. Worse.

At least when I’m sick it just comes out of me and it’s done. I vomit on average once a day and I’ll be nauseous for three or four hours but sometimes 24. So if you’ve come to this video looking for some tips from an expert- believe me, you’ve found one!

Now, not all of these tips are ‘healthy’ but when you’re being murdered by nausea who gives a flying you-know-what? I’ve tried every anti-nausea drug going and nothing has ever worked. These are the things that work for me and I’ve found through many long years of sickness. You can also read everything in my latest blog post, you’ll find the link for that in the description.

1. Ginger

I’m starting you off easy with one most people know about: ginger. Don’t bother with the pre-packaged tea, it doesn’t really have enough of the good stuff in. The best way I’ve found is to chop up some ginger and pour boiling water over it. Add a sweetener tab and we’re good to go. It’s not really known why ginger works on nausea, it just does. This is a very low-level cure however. Ginger tea will only work on starter level nausea, if you’re already on the floor and unable to move your head it won’t touch it. It is however very fragrant. And apparently excellent with pregnancy and morning sickness. This cure is on a par with our next one…

2. Peppermint

This is the go-to for when you’re out and about, it’s the easiest cure to get hold of. It will help level 1 nausea but is really effective for motion sickness or if there are any smells around adding to the sense of ‘I might vom at any moment’. Don’t bother with gum, chewing is just going to work up your stomach juices and that helps nobody. Suck a mint instead. It will also help if you really need to eat but have been feeling too nauseous to do so. Peppermint tea also works but I’ve found only fresh leaves work, not the bags. It’s also great for freshening your breath when just the idea of a toothbrush makes you want to chuck up your lunch.

3. Gaviscon and Werthers

In the same vein as a mint, the heartburn and indigestion relief Gaviscon works tremendously well but, I find, only on mass! They taste very chalky, which might activate your gag reflex, so I’ve found the best way to have them is with sugar free Werthers originals! Four Gaviscon, two Werthers, chew them up together until there’s nothing left in your mouth. Boom. Five minutes later I can actually function. I have no idea why the Werthers activate the Gaviscon and make them more powerful.

4. Diet Coke

I’ve spoken about this before but it works so well I can’t not put it in here… When I first became ill my doctor and I tried every antiemetic pill going- the massive ones you crumble into drinks, the tiny one you put under your tongue. The one that makes your lips numb. The one that makes them blue (just me?). I have so many issues with the Coca Cola company but golly this thing works! Apparently, the high levels of artificial sweetener in the diet and zero versions would make the drink register as sickly sweet but to counteract this they include an antiemetic… And it’s the best one I’ve ever encountered. It works. It just… works. It’s great to have a few sips after a meal, when you’re starting to feel a little queezy, it’s great to have a little glass in the morning to keep the nausea at bay and it’s excellent to have a whole pint glass when you can feel the nauseous doom coming for you. Drink through a straw though, obviously. I’d be a very bad dentist’s wife if I didn’t say that.

5. Diet Lemonade with Apple Cider Vinegar

Another drink but possibly not something you were expecting. This is the bomb when you feel like hurling is imminent. It’s a very old cure for all sorts of things and I understand why, it really does work. Although it might make your pee smell funny. 1 cup of liquid to 1 tablespoon of vinegar. If your stomach can’t handle the fizz of lemonade then put it in sweetened water- I particularly like it with Ribena. Although this is excellent for starting digestion, and particularly great just after a meal, do be aware that if you feel the problem is too much acidity it’s obviously not going to help. Also try to avoid having too much as the side effect of that is certainly… nausea. Also. Do not kiss my wife after drinking vinegar. She won’t like it. Although that might relate just to me.

Your wife probably won’t like it either though.

6. Protein Powder and Sweetener

nauseaThis one I’m actually a bit embarrassed to share. It’s my dirty secret. This is the top of the range, all time best, class A of anti-nausea cures. Try not to freak out about it though… Take a cup of sweetener, add a spoonful of protein powder (preferably vanilla flavoured), mix, eat. Yep. Just like that. Just as it is. It makes me feel so guilty and wrong but it just works. It works perfectly. The protein powder will swell up in your stomach and counteracts the acid because its so alkaline. If you’re feeling sick in a very watery way then this is for you. It will cure even level three sickness.

So there you go, there are my top anti-nausea tips. Let me know in the comments if you have any others or if you have tried any of these.